Listing Copy that Sells
You're paying to be listed...will your copy draw them in or send them away?
By Kristin Zhivago, Editor of Marketing Technology
John Smith is the CMO for a large, Fortune 500 company. He's looking for a marketing and sales automation solution. He's just the kind of customer you want to attract, and he's ready to buy. Using KnowledgeStorm's advanced search capability, in a few seconds he's looking at vendor listings for marketing automation products that will work for a company of his size.
When he opens a listing, the two sections he focuses on are the Overview and Distinguishing Features. But, as he reads through listing after listing, he's increasingly disappointed. The copy doesn't answer his questions. "Damn," he thinks. After all, here he is, budget approved, ready to make a purchase. He doggedly clicks on, hoping to find what he's looking for.
Why isn't John finding what he needs? What's wrong with the copy?
The copy is written for someone who is just beginning to wonder about a solution. People who are actively searching for a solution in the KnowledgeStorm directory are well beyond the stage when you have to "get their attention." Too much listing copy wastes John's time by describing his problems to him (a silly exercise anyway-John knows more about his problems than anyone selling to him or writing to him). Or, they waste precious copy space bragging about the superiority of their solution.
The copy is too general. Most of the vendors use the same words to describe their solutions. For example, this copy could be applied to hundreds of marketing automation products: "The product lets you maximize profitability from your strongest customer relationships by facilitating customer acquisition and retention, identifying up-sell and cross-sell opportunities, improving the timeliness and impact of direct customer and prospect communication." This copy is a complete waste of selling space.
The copy is too impersonal. "Product X enables organizations to align campaigns with appropriate target audiences; plan and execute highly personalized campaigns with the right message at the right time; use preferred communication channels; and measure, monitor, and refine campaign performance to ensure optimal return on investment." This is not person-to-person copy. You would never talk to another human being in this stilted, third-person-removed, snotty voice.
They're not answering the biggest question that all software buyers are asking now: "What's going to happen to me after I buy?" Copywriters are still writing as if their customers are new to software solutions. They continue to promise "increased productivity" and "seamless integration" to people who have spent years wrestling with one automation nightmare after another. The John Smiths of the world have been through database hell, networking hell, and CRM hell. Vendors who continue to make vague, industry-common promises are wasting their time. John knows better. When he sees these tired old promises, he will simply shake his head and click over to the next vendor's listing.
They're simply not answering the buyer's questions. Here they are, in a virtual open marketplace. When a buyer comes to their stall and asks them a question, they look at him with a blank stare and say, "Um, I dunno."
How can you avoid these mistakes?
- Be specific. Assume your buyer is already interested, already somewhat knowledgeable about your kind of product and ready to find out what your product can do for him. Stuff your copy with facts and figures. Don't just say, "Features a robust processing capability." Instead, say: "Product X is handling over a million transactions per day for one ticket-selling site, and is still only working at less than 3% of its capacity." Talk about how the product solves business problems: "Every person who interacts with a customer can call up the customer's file and record the outcome of that interaction. Managers are automatically informed when a customer is upset, via an email, and can personally respond in seconds."
- Be personal. If you want John to get excited about your solution, you'll have to know what he's looking for. You need to interview your existing customers and ask them: "What was it about our product that made you decide to buy ours? What problem were you hoping to solve when you started looking, and what were your thought processes as you were trying to decide?" Every buyer has a story. You need to know what those stories are. You need to find the common thread in all those stories. After just 5 interviews, it will start to become obvious to you. By the tenth interview, you'll know exactly what you need to say, and what you should say first. Put those concepts at the beginning of your Overview and Distinguishing Features copy. Your buyer will see himself in your copy, because you'll be describing the experiences of others like him.
- Tell them what will happen after they buy. As if you are telling a story, tell your buyer exactly how the product will be purchased and installed, and describe the user's experience with the product. Write frank, fact-filled, visual copy: "After entering your password, you will be looking at the Dashboard. Select from three options: Open, Continue, Close. Here's what you can do with each of these options..." Put the buyer in the driver's seat. Describe what it will be like to drive the car.
- Get the tone right. Don't write in a stilted, snobby tone. Speak to your buyer as you would speak to a friend. Start as many sentences with a verb as you can. Note that this entire paragraph, so far, is written this way, making it easier for you to grasp the concepts. If I were to write this paragraph in typical impersonal marketing-speak, which attempted to say the same thing but failed to help you, I would have said: "The tone of the copy is critical to the buyer-seller relationship. The best copywriters employ an active, personal style that enables readers to more easily assimilate the information." Look at your own copy. Does it look more like the first part of this paragraph, or the second?
- Don't even bother to list with KnowledgeStorm if you aren't going to answer buyer questions. Why pay to be listed if your listing is incomplete? Your buyer has come to you, ready for you to sell him. But when he arrives at your listing, there's hardly any information there. The copy in these listings is more important than any other selling copy you will write, because the people who have come to your listing are highly qualified prospects. This is your big chance. They are standing at your door, money in hand. Answer their most important questions first-honestly, factually, and visually.
Take any product in the world. Ask the producers of that product to list its top ten most important features. Then ask their customers to list their top ten features. We guarantee that the lists will be different. Even if they all had the same features listed (and that is never the case), the customer lists will show the features in a different order. If you're writing copy using "your own list," you're making it tougher for John Smith to figure out how your product will help him.
The copy you write for your KnowledgeStorm listing has to work harder than any other copy you've ever written. It must be relevant, specific, and personal. And it must answer the questions that buyers actually have, not the ones you think they have. Anything less, and John Smith will simply keep on clicking.
Kristin Zhivago is the editor of Marketing Technology, an online ezine for marketers, and the Revenue Journal, a downloadable newsletter for CEOs. She is also the president of Zhivago Marketing Partners, Inc., a firm that helps companies increase their revenues. And, yes, she does give copywriting classes to marketing departments.
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